All lovers of songs that were written with the Vocaloid software know the name of Kikuo, a music producer who has already written more than 20 musical compositions. He is known for often combining dark, terrifying subjects with upbeat, upbeat music in his work. Behind the external abomination of his texts are interesting, albeit disgusting (in terms of the topics and problems raised) stories. Most often, Kikuo uses the voice of Hatsune Miku for his songs – the most popular Vocaloid, whose appearance is known even to people who are completely far from anime culture. Kikuo’s most famous songs are “Aishite aishite aishite” and “Gomenne gomenne”. In this article, we will analyze the second composition.
If you listen to the melody separately from the text, not knowing what it is sung about, then you still get a feeling of discomfort. The fact is that Kikuo makes good use of tools to convey the atmosphere. In two places in this composition, the sound becomes low-frequency and feels like it is made up of only beats, which creates a feeling of anxiety. However, these same sounds are soon replaced by a cheerful melody (playing in the chorus), which, apart from the rest of the composition, could play on some children’s channel. This contrast only reinforces the feeling of fear.
Meaning of the song Gomen Ne, Gomen Ne
At the first listening, a completely understandable and transparent plot immediately arises: a cannibal father eats his daughter. However, of course, this is not the case. Anyone who is intimately familiar with songs written with Vocaloids knows that songwriters often like to tell stories metaphorically. Here, cannibalism is a clear metaphor for sexual abuse.
The main character, most likely, was raped by her father from childhood, saying that this is how she expresses her love and that this form of love is the only possible one. The heroine has lived in this atmosphere of violence all her life, but suddenly a certain “new friend” appears next to her, who, according to the heroine, feels sorry for her. He takes the girl with him, but does not want to use any kind of violence against her, because of which the heroine concludes that the “friend” considers her body disgusting, terrible and ugly. She decides to return to the only person who accepts her for who she is, that is, to her father.
Here it is worth inserting that the story of the song is told from the point of view of an unreliable narrator (a hero who gives deliberately false information). Most often, unreliable narrators are people with mental disabilities or people who are too biased towards the events they are talking about. In our case, the heroine’s psyche is clearly crippled: she is used to the fact that violence is always used against her, and the options when this does not happen are abnormal for her. Most likely, in fact, the events took place like this: a man who was mentally healthy met the heroine.
He sees the terrible state the girl is in and decides to save her and show her a better life. At the same time, it does not matter at all whether these heroes are united by a romantic connection or simple friendship. The heroine runs away from her father and begins to live with a “new friend”. But here’s the problem: he treats her with respect, doesn’t want her to experience the horrors that she experienced in the house, and tries to show a normal life. The crippled consciousness of the heroine cannot accept this reality: for her, a man who does not beat her and does not rape her is a man who simply disdains her and considers her terrible and unworthy. Then she leaves him and returns to her father. She feels guilty about daring to leave the person who “loves” and “accepts” her and starts apologizing endlessly (chorus).
At the end, the most terrifying scene imaginable begins. At home, the heroine is already waiting for her father and friends. They say: “We knew, we were waiting: You will come back.” Everyone wants to “share” the heroine “for lunch”, which clearly implies gang rape. The heroine dies. The song ends.
The idea is clearly visible in history: not a single victim of violence is to blame for the violence committed, no matter who says what. Kikuo shows this by how the heroine, even after being treated in the most disgusting way possible, continues to apologize, believing it was her fault. This exaggerated image shows how absurd it is to claim that the victim is to blame for the violence.